: : A start of a new Journey.. : :

It looks like I'm doing what most my friends are doing.. blogging.. hmm.. this is.. a start of a new journey.. where i can jot down things that i can't present by speech.. yet i can present it in words. It's not like i'm hoping for anyone to read this.. but this happens to be the best way to jot down what i really feel deep down inside this heart of mine. Life just couldn't get worse especially when you're starting to lose friends, the ones that are ultimately close to you.. My 2 dearest are drifting further and further apart.. it's like those little paper boats little boys used to let go flowing along in the drain drifting further and further away.. it's just that for me.. i didn't know how could they sail away when i didn't even let them in the water. This 2 i long to talk to since we parted. Since we started going seperate ways.. Since one has become smarter.. and the other.. umm.. dumber? well.. it's like we somehow stop in this crossroad.. and one takes the straight path.. the other 2 took the left and right.. each leading to 2 seperate lives. They do not need me anymore.. I don't get phone calls in the middle of the night out of no reason anymore.. I don't hear complains coming in my ears anymore.. I don't see tears dripping on my shoulder anymore.. they do not need me anymore.. Friends.. what are friends? people who feel mutual affection and regard for another? what more best friends? Are friends supposed to come to you only at certain times and leaving you alone when you really need them? Are friends supposed to stay just temporarily and move out as they like without even informing me? Him and Her... how i wished i could just tell them how i feel.. but everytime i tried to.. they seemed to not care.. not like how they used to anymore..

The both of you were once an important part of my life,
then, I thought without the both of you, I would not live,
it's like I had done something wrong,
why did the both of you have to go?

Did I hold on too tight?
I know sometimes we do fight,
and I missed the times,
when we used to care about each other more than dimes.

15 years I have lived,
2 happy years you guys gave,
but why are u stopping what you have been doing?
Why leave me here alone crying?

We used to hold on for long hours,
backing up each other no matter what happens,
now you both have someone else,
I'm not that important anymore, I'm just somebody else.

I'm not desperate, I'm not without friends,
it's just that we've all been through so much together,
why are we giving up on each other just like that?
can we please try to hold on to each other?

It may be time to move on,
but what's wrong with moving on while holding on?
Your loved ones might have won,
but it's okay, I'll always be there for the both of you to cry on..

I'll be waiting for the day,
the day both of you come back to my embrace,
the day you both come for me to be happy,
I'll just say I love you both now.. just in case..

- my thoughts to be heard.. but yet i can only present them through words.-